Today is New Years Eve, 2017! And, “Oh my God,” I will be 35 next month. This has got to be the year, in my boss’ words, “that I get off my tricycle and get on my motorcycle.” Some things have got to stop in your 30s, starting 2018. Don’t worry! This isn’t a “new year, new me” post or a “new year’s resolution” post. I won’t waste my breath nor your time, for obvious reasons. However, after brainstorming five things that must change, I sent a mass text to all of my girlfriends to discuss some of the things we absolutely MUST change in 2018. Here is what we came up with.
- Living Beyond Your Means. As soon as your favorite beauty vlogger mentions a new product to snatch up, your favorite shoe store has a sale, or maybe you just need your hair slayed for the New Year, just WAIT! Treating yourself is important, but not if you’ll be screwing up your budget or scrambling to make ends meet. For those of you who are in love with retail therapy, it may be time to get bad spending habits under control. In order to begin to see progress, such as buying that new house, new car or seeing an A1 credit score, impulsive spending needs to be added to our list of things we absolutely must stop in 2018.
- Keeping Clutter. Those dresses that we know we’ll never wear again – say bye! Yes, they’re cute, but we just know we won’t wear them again. Get rid of them! Give them to the salvation army, to a church or to a baby cousin. Clutter in the house creates distraction. The clearer the house is, the better you can focus.
- Bring Classy Back. Ladies, stop thinking that being ratchet is cute! Everything that embodied ratchetness got the most attention in 2017. Lets see. The twerk challenge broke the internet. I can see if you did this in the privacy of your own home for your significant other, but for the whole world to see? No sis! What will your children think when they get older and see mommy on her knees, “throwing it in a circle.” Yes, I said it ladies. Bring classy back!
- Making Broken Promises to Yourself. Last year around this time, I did a 7-day fast and documented it on my blog post about completing my goals. It was called “When Giving Up Is Not An Option.” I can’t believe the impact that it had on my life. I fasted to finding a job and to working on my career. Let me tell you, prayer works! Shortly after that, everything fell into my lap. I went to school for Substance Abuse Counseling and also applied for an internship in the field to fulfill my requirements. Who would have thought that I would be hired as a full-time Substance Abuse Counselor. Look at God! Even though that is the good news, the bad news is that I neglected my weight-loss goals. I fluctuated with the same 10 lbs. all year.
- Falling in Love too Quickly. Frankly, I’m tired of seeing women sulk over a man, feeling bad because they are single, settling for someone because they are lonely or just rushing into relationships too soon. Now is the time to get to know yourself better. Stop rushing love! Your man is coming. Just because he seems like the perfect man, doesn’t mean drop every man you’ve ever had and be faithful to him. He could just end up being a really good friend or even Mr. Wrong! Have fun, be friends first, and weigh things out. It will work out in the long run.
- Being Offended. Taking offense is one of my biggest problems. Actually, in the group text that I sent out, a couple of people on the text hinted at some offense that they were holding on to; maybe it was grudges from unresolved issues. The chat quickly went from goals in 2018 to somewhere else, which is why this is the first thing to do in 2018. Don’t hold on to offense. Offense just makes you miserable and bitter. It keeps you holding on to the hurt and pain, instead of growing.
- Butt Photos. Okay, not to be the social media police or rain on anyone’s parade. I hardly every engage in other people’s business, but I am my sister’s keeper. This so called “butt selfie trend” is out of control. So if I see one of my girls with a photo of their booty out on the sink or in the club, it may be worth mentioning. Your backside is the wrong side to advertise about yourself, sis! It actually looks bad if you’ve been applying for jobs. You wouldn’t want your backside to be the first thing that an employer sees on your profile. Additionally, no man wants a woman who the world has already seen.
- Stop Neglecting Ourselves. For 2018, I will eventually get my weight-loss tea that I have my heart set on, Iaso Tea. I promise that I will eventually get back in the gym. I will also get my nails done –when I can. I haven’t been to church in some months, and honestly haven’t had the urge to. But I know that I need God and need to get back connected spiritually. Enough of the self-neglect in 2018. We need to take care of ourselves mentally, physically and emotionally.
- Selfishness: Aim to be Selfless. My longtime friend made a good point. While we’re trying to grow into better people, we often become self-orientated. She said, “If having a talk is showing concern, and cost nothing, then why not reach out? Why not be there for a family member who just may need to talk. I’m not saying be the all savior of Mother Theresa. It’s the little things that don’t or won’t even effect the hair on your chinny chin chin.” There should be a balance in my opinion. We can’t do too much or save the world, but sometimes we can pick up the phone and reach out to friends and family.
- Don’t Hate. Congratulate! This year, when you see another woman doing well, lift her up. Don’t be quick to discourage but encourage. And last but not least, pray for one another!
Have a blessed year ladies! xoxo